Monday, September 8, 2014

An Open Letter To My Children On Marriage




My Children,

Everyone always wants to know  the secret to a marriage that lasts, a marriage that is rock solid through the ages. They ask as if it's a mystical combination that takes years of pondering and study to grasp. What's so funny is that the secret is so simple. Stay. No matter what- stay. Always stay. It's simple to define but can be VERY hard to practice every day. Now should you stay if there's abuse involved, of course not, but otherwise, stay. Even if you want to run with every fiber of your being because, don't you know, 'the grass DOES always look greener on the other side'. Stay. Stay anyway. Remember the day you took your marriage vows- they weren't just words- they were actions. Actions to stay through thick and thin, ups and downs. Stay. Love them no matter what. Love them when it hurts to love. Love them when they maybe don't deserve to be loved. Love them and stay. This world we live in, has made it commonplace to trade in our spouses on 'better' ones. It's a lie, we're all just humans, flawed. Don't buy into this world's lies. Marry the one you love and trust that your instincts were right. Trust that you loved them because it was meant to be and stay. Life is going to be flawed. There will undoubtedly be sicknesses, maybe addictions, falls from grace, the key is to remember that it's life that's flawed, not your spouse. Our world is filled with sin, and we must live here and sometimes fail here, but help raise up your spouse out of the depths of sin and stay. Don't abandon them because they fell victim to sin. Stay. A forever marriage is a battle each and EVERY day. Don't be sucked into the fairy-tale that if it's not easy, it's not right. If it's not hard, it's not right. 
So my children, what's the secret to a forever marriage, one that lasts through the ages- stay. No matter what- stay. Always stay.
Love,

12 comments:

  1. In my life group this week we were discussing marriage. I tried to say this but didn't say it nearly so well. :) Yes, sometimes you just stick it out. I'm fairly new to your blog and am enjoying it!

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    1. Sheila, I'm so happy that you're here! Yep, I agree, sometimes we have to just stick it out even though every fiber of us screams "run"! I pray with all my heart that all four of our children always stay!

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  2. I really like this letter. Staying is hard, I'm going through my own troubles right now. But I am holding on by a few threads and am working really hard to sew the pieces back together because the right marriage is worth it. We wouldn't be so tempted to go if we only tended our own lawns a little more.

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    1. I sorry to hear that you are going through a difficult time right now. It's happened to us many times in the 23 years that we've been married, but I'm so grateful that we both toughed it out! I hope that your load lightens soon. Thanks so much for visiting today!

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  3. Beautifully and well-written! This is a cry not often heard these days, but so basic and true! Thank you so much for sharing and for linking up with us at Wake Up Wednesday. Sharing your post of my FB page today.

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    1. Thank you for sharing Karen AND a big thank you for hosting Wake Up Wednesday!

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  4. Beautiful post and I like how explicit everything is here. I am sure your kids will have a wonderful married life because they have you to guide them.

    Thank you for linking up with us on Wake-Up Wednesdays. I am Tanya from Kreative Korner, a co-host for the party.
    http://tanyaanurag.blogspot.com/

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  5. Wanted you to know that I shared this post on my FB today, and am using it as part of a ladies conference, at the end of the Month, where I will be speaking on "Harmony with Your Husband."

    Thank you so much. (Be assured that I will credit you.) I likely will blog about this as well, and then will provide links etc. www.HOMEAGAINJiggetyjig.com/wp

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    1. Marjorie that is so sweet of you to share! I pray that our children heed this cry to tough it out in their marriages one day! I'm so grateful that you will be able to use this at your ladies conference. Have a wonderful time!

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  6. Hi Amy, Thank you so much for sharing this sweet and encouraging letter you wrote to your children! I love to write letters to my children and marriage is a topic close to my heart! I'm going to feature this post at the Family Fun Friday Link Up on my blog this week. Blessings, Misty

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    1. Misty, thank you so very much for the feature! Have a great week!

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  7. This is a good reminder to many people. I would have said, "Grow up and put some effort into it! No-one forced you to marry and it is not compulsory. You did this of your own free will. Make it work. If not you, then who? If not now, then when?" Some people seem to think that being married is having a pretty wedding. No. Being married is living your lives together for ever. Do not make that decision carelessly. If you can not really commit to all that entails then do not marry.

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When y'all leave comments, my heart just swells! Thanks for sharing your thoughts!

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